Midlife Doesn’t Have to be a Crisis
Midlife crisis. That’s what other dudes have. Lame guys with a combover or a beer gut. Guys who don’t have it together. If I use the term “midlife crisis” about myself, then by proxy I become lame as well. But let’s face it, if you are over 40 and you are feeling the sense that life is passing you by, or you are frustrated with where you are and you need a change, then you might just be looking down the barrel of a midlife crisis.
You Aren’t the Only One!
It’s okay! You’re not alone. Thinking that you are is the toughest part. We men compartmentalize so much that we think we are pretty special. “No one has ever gone through this before!” Even though we truly are the rugged individuals we hope to be, it turns out that we still have a lot in common.
Any of this sound familiar: Career seems stagnant. Finances suck. Somewhere along the line we thought we’d figure out the spiritual thing, but we haven’t. We’ve grown too comfortable with our wives—or they’ve grown to comfortable with us—and our marriages aren’t what we’d like. And sex? What, maybe once a week? If that?
As we reach this age, our parents may have passed on, or we can tell it won’t be long. Death has come to visit our circle of friends more than it used to. We’ve had to grieve more than we’ve wanted to, and we are getting more cognizant of our own mortality.
Again, you are not alone.
See, that’s what I always thought. “Surely it’s just me.” And the next natural thought: “If it’s just me, then that’s a great sign that I’m pretty screwed up.” This blog—this community—is here to assure you that it’s not just you.
Once you figure that out, it seems that the fog begins to lift and you can focus on winning your life back. Because it’s pretty a good go from here on. Sure, our bodies aren’t as young as they used to be, but our minds are more experienced, better educated, more ready to meet challenges, and able make the most of our potential.
That more mature mind is ready to find ways to make the most of our lives, our finances, our marriages, even these middle-aged bodies.
Sure, this Place is for the Guys, but…
Maybe you are a guy who is reading this and saying “Yeah, that’s pretty much me.” Welcome! Have a look around. Stay for awhile. Join a community of men who are figuring out that life isn’t “half over,” but is just starting to really come together.
…Ladies are Welcome Too!
Maybe you are one of the ladies. I see you there. Lurking. Reading. Thinking, “This is so my man. I just want him to be happy. To find his purpose. To….” Whatever that is, you are welcome here too. Look around. See if you find something you think will connect. Feel free to share an article or two with him. Help him to realize that he’s not alone. Honestly, it gets better. And when it gets better for him, it gets better for you.
Who am I? Well, if you really want a bio, I guess you can just click here, but I’m just a guy who realized that life wasn’t what I wanted, and I wanted to reduce the suck factor just a bit. I’m just a guy who thought he was the only one going through this, and felt so much better when I found out it wasn’t just me. I’m just a guy who has always had the desire to reach out to men and, not only be a helping hand, but to also find a few helping hands. “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17)
Once we realize we are not alone—or just stop romanticizing being some kind of lone wolf against the world—then we can find ways to sharpen one another. Because surviving and thriving our midlife years is something we can’t do alone.
If you need a boost a couple of times a week, or maybe you want to find ways to be the boost for others, then please sign up to get regular updates when new posts are published or when opportunities for community present themselves. I look forward to meeting you and traveling this path with you. The best years are not behind us. Corny as it may sound, I truly believe the best is yet to come! Let’s find out together how good it’s going to be.